Dappan Koothu » Yellow Chudidaar

Good morning senior saar

maxdavinci — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 03:50:51 +0000

College is the best thing that ever happened to me and I’d go back given a chance. To my knowledge almost everyone would, so big deal. As part of the flashback series we continue from where we let off in the previous post. For those who’ve come in late, a quick recap. Me and a friend ragged a girl while oblivious to the fact that she was a lecturer on her first day. As fate would have it, she was assigned to take labs for us. When she entered the lab and announced that she would be taking charge for the semester, me and my friend hid under the tables. We’ve been hiding under the desk for three days now, so let me tell you what happened in the promised part-2.

Ms.Yellow Chudidaar was at the other side of the lab introducing herself to the students while I was trying to come up with a escape plan. People around us noticed that we were hiding under the table and soon everyone in the the last two rows had noticed. The dreaded
roll
call began
and I hadn’t
yet thought
of an escape planThe dreaded roll call began and I hadn’t yet thought of an escape plan. Unable to bear the multiple kya hua’s from everyone my smart ass friend told them that his SIM card had fallen somewhere. Another moron offered to help and joined us under the tables. So now we had one guy planning an escape, one almost ready to shit in his pants and one who was looking for a non-existent SIM card! The door was far away and the windows were grilled, so the only plan was to stay put for as long as possible and then sneak away when one of our so-called-studious girls ask Ms.Yellow Chudidaar their impression-ke-liye doubts. I was roll no 15 and my buddy was 23, we had mutually agreed to remain silent, while the third guy was still looking for the SIM card! Ms.Yellow Chudidaar rattled of the numbers and soon arrived at 15, at that point I so badly wished there were a hundred numbers between 1 and 15.

Ms. Yellow Chudidaar: fifteen (no answer)
Ms. Yellow Chudidaar: fifteen (everybody turn to the last row)
Ms. Yellow Chudidaar: Is he here? (I signal to the SIM card guy)
SIM Card guy: Hasn’t come today maam.

She then went on with the remaining numbers when suddenly my buddy’s conscience awoke. At call for 23 I saw him giving me the look. Little did I know that it was an indicator for what was to follow and he stood up and answered for the call of 24. In the process his head hit the desk again and he also gave out a yell. Ms.Yellow Chudidaar who was looking at the register all this while, looked up and was startled to see two guys who had stood up and answered to 24. You may call it an act of stupidity or bravery but he was ready to face this demons. I wanted to bang his head on the bus for his stupidity but was also awe of him for standing up.

Ms. Yellow Chudidaar: What is going on here? Who are you by the way? (pointing to my buddy)
Buddy: Maam, I’m sorry I’m 23.
Ms. Yellow Chudidaar: What were you doing when I called your number?
Buddy: Was looking for my SIM card under the table (that bastard had the whole class laughing)
I was all-in at this moment and went for broke. I stood up carefully without hurting my head
Ms. Yellow Chudidaar: Who are you and what were you doing there?
Me: 15 here Maam, I was helping him look for the SIM card (even louder laughter and some guys banged the desk like the lok sabha)
Ms. Yellow Chudidaar: Silence please! Meet me after the lab if the two of you want attendance.

We sat down silently and the roll call continued, we didn’t speak to each other for the next 60 minutes. Despite everyone asking/IMing us we tried very hard to shrug them off and genuinely played the SIM card story. The next 60 minutes were the shortest in my life for it only seemed like 10 minutes before the bell rang. Everyone left the lab and we were the only ones left along with Ms.Yellow Chudidaar. As we trudged towards the lecturers desk, I was preparing an i-am-sorry speech in my head. Just I was about to speak, My so-called-clever buddy interjected.

Buddy: Come on maam, we didn’t do anything serious na! (I was totally zonked by his statement)
Ms.Yellow Chudidaar: What do you mean? and how dare you rag a lecturer? (Time for damage control as I prepare fro the worst)
Me: We are extremely sorry maam but you look so young and anyone can mistake you for a student. (The youth card always works with women)
Ms.Yellow Chudidaar: (In no mood for flattery) What are your names, let me report you to the HOD. Don’t you know that ragging is banned?
Buddy: We only asked you your name, details etc and made you to do a salute, can’t you forgive us? Plus my friend here began the ARS!

ARS stood for Anti Ragging Squad and that was the last thing that I needed. What followed was some of the most embarrassing moments and we tried everything but ‘pair pakadna‘. She was a recent graduate and let us off with a smart bargain. I wonder if it was our begging skills or my charm that worked on her, lets stick to the former! To save my skin I had to ensure that my gang never missed a lab and attended all her classes. That included free lunches and other stuff to persuade people to attend lab and not the volley-ball court. Till the last day, if there was no one around Ms.Yellow Chudidaar would always greet me with a ‘Good Morning Senior Saar‘. Every time that happened I felt like digging a hole in the ground and hiding my head.

However this didn’t stop me from keeping a watch on the freshers!

(Image courtesy: NYTimes)

If you enjoyed this post, then you may also like:

Oops I ragged her again!

maxdavinci — Sat, 06 Sep 2008 04:42:36 +0000

As India yesterday celebrated Teachers Day to commemorate the birth of the second President of free India Radhakrishnan garu, I tried to recollect some of the horrible things I have done. I am not going to mislead anyone by claiming that I have been the teachers pet. I’d rather say that I was a teacher’s nightmare and my mom never attended any parent-teacher-meeting for she knew that she would always be in the firing line. I was always an out-standing student though, if you know what I’m talking about! The same continued in college and I only had virtual presence in class by proxy. My real attendance though was a 100% in the volleyball court and the canteen.

We were never the ideal students anyone would look up to, that gang was separate. We’d get into fights, break rules, have tiffs with the staff and engage in
anti-social
activities that
can’t be mentioned hereengage in anti-social activities that can’t be mentioned here. According to me if you haven’t boycotted classes, got into a scuffle or been suspended in large numbers then you can consider your 4yrs of Engineering worthless. Ragging was probably the most fulfilling experience and here I mean both ragging and getting ragged. A lot of people may get touchy on hearing the ‘R’ word and launch scathing attacks against me. If anybody wants to argue on the inhuman activities that are passed off as ragging then you are more than welcome to be my guest. It’s only those without a spine that get ragged badly and if you cant stand up to a bunch of guys elder to you, then forget the world! The previous line may not go well with many, but then I’ve seen the worst things happen and experience speaks! If a guy from a posh urban school is today lean mean and tougher than most rowdies, then I’d without an iota of doubt attribute it to those four years. So lets not further incite the ragging debate and get to the crux of this post. I have tons of ragging stories but most of them aren’t suitable for family audiences, this one however takes the cake.

We were in the IIIrd yr and the semester had just begun. All the IInd yr students were hanging around the Ist floor verandahs like vultures waiting for their prey. The first floor was reserved for offices in the left wing and fresher classrooms in the right wing. The freshers would walk with their heads hung low and desperately try to avoid eye contact and be conspicuous. They’d rush into their classrooms and bury their heads into their textbooks, praying for the bell to ring and classes to commence. Seniors(IInd n IIIrd yr) would either call the most conspicuous ones out of the classrooms and take them to the ground or canteen or even get into the classrooms and have some fun. I was just sitting on the railing keeping an eye over the proceedings with a sense of deja vu, been there done that! For the uninformed, after tormenting kids for a yr and doing unspeakable things under the name of ragging I was one of the founders of the anti-ragging-squad. Yea yea, we had a free hand and earned a lot of enemies among the staff and hence this was our way of redemption.

I always encouraged healthy ragging but kept an eye so that no one went overboard. Me and my buddy saw this girl walk by in a yellow chudidaar with a long book in hand. My friend was pretty pissed of by the fact that she ignored us and walked past without even greeting. I must tell you that in our part of the country, all freshers greet seniors with a salute and
a good
morning sir/maamall freshers greet seniors with a salute and a good morning sir/maam. I was busy channeling my energies on a cute girl in CS but my buddy wanted to do something. In a total maddy moment I snapped my fingers twice (it’s pretty loud), she stopped and turned. With my index finger I signaled her to come closer, she frowned and came. I was once again looking at my interesting CS fresher while my friend grilled Ms.Yellow Chudidaar. She wasn’t replying and just stared at him, he lost patience and I had to intervene. With my steely gaze and stern voice I asked her to do the salute and greeting and get one with her day. I could see her quiver and hence didn’t want to stretch things further. She did it but kept turning back and passing cold stares as she walked away. Well we were highly respected among the kids, and most of em’ saw as as messiahs but this one in particular irked my buddy. We went back to scouting for interesting females and telling over enthusiastic kids to back off.

The bell rang and we all trudged back to our classes while the freshers were happy that their prayers were answered. Ms. Yellow Chudidaar had disturbed my friend a lot and he kept talking of her during class. We attended class for we had the guy’s lab in the next hour and lab was something we’d never miss. The bell rang and as we were going to the lab, my buddy was still thinking of ways to get even with Ms.Yellow Chudidaar during the lunch hour.

Suddenly Ms.Yellow chudidaar walks into the lab and announces. Morning students, I am XXXX and I shall be handling this lab from today.

The world stopped rotating for a minute as everything went blank. Me and my buddy hid under the desks and banged our foreheads in the confusion.

(To be continued in part-2…….)

Image courtesy: NYTimes

If you enjoyed this post, then you may also like: